Survivor

I survived the hurricane that killed without mercy,

the hurricane that swept lives and souls away,

and as the only survivor of the world's worst tragedy,

little did i know the future offered the same reality...

Please...

If you know me irl and you found this blog.

Please..

Please save me.

I beg you..

Bobobobobobo

Tau tak cemane rase frustnye bila urge nk  acah-acah tulis puisi datang tapi takde idea sebab kau tak feel pape T.T mcm void gila feelings tu lol. -_-

Imagine if we start filling the void with the remembrance of Allah, 
surely our hearts will find rest

Messed up

Now only I realised how much people have messed me up. Or maybe how much I blamed people how much they messed me up. Shit. 

Just saying

Stop believing that a person is more than a person. Stop saying that a person is so cheerful and care-free when you don't see their struggles.


The thing about depression is you never realize you have fallen into the trap until you fall out of it. Even when you fall out of it, you'll struggle not to fall into the same hole again. You'll even wonder why nobody has ever came to save you during your intense vitality lost.

Do we even need a saviour when we ourselves could be your own hero?

Escape

It is frustrating when you enter the University with a mountain of hope just to see them falling apart day by day. Many times, overthinking drives you mad, playing back the same scenes again and again at the back of your mind just to be reminded on how suffocating the world could be. To be reminded on how many occasions you have failed, the tests you have flunked, people you disappoint, the fake laughs that you hoped were real as the list goes on and on...

The sadness is dangerously addicting, even more dangerous than cocaine. They run in your blood and are unable to be flushed away from your system no matter how much you  tried. You scream, you beg for mercy to get rid of all the self-destructing thoughts, just to open wide and bleed the same wound again, just to be laughed and teased by the voices again whose voices are  too familiar and harsher than the people out there. Whose voices are ironically seemed to be your only true companion, a destructive companion. 

Expecting life to always be easy leads you further down the rabbit hole of feeling terrible. The only way out of this is to......

// Sebenarnya nak bwt post yg acah-acah redha macamtu tapi nk buat the first 2 paraghraphs pun dah ambil mase so skrg dah mengantuk nak tido...lol lamenya aku -_- will edit whenever i feel like it lol. ciaoz

cuti

Maybe I should start tumbling back

But this time I'd be in the optimistic ,

 engaging and productive side of tumblr.

yep.

Walk.

I once told my friend I used to walk to API from KUAZ alone.

She wasn't really shocked

***

and then I realized I forgot to tell her it was at 2am in the morning.

2016

 This year I hope that people are more understanding and less judging but

most importantly, people will continue chasing their dreams & live their life to the fullest :)

choker

F: Akak, orang nak diet lah
K: Lahh awat tetiba?
F: Haha, sebab selfie pakai choker tak brape lawa lah. jawlines tak prominent lol. tak ckp goth la lelz, macam fat emo je =_=
K: lol...